tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1638918391005027628.post2544780833538336198..comments2013-06-17T21:39:16.733-07:00Comments on DemMangoes: Response to No Red Pill No BlueAndrewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01426242485625656957noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1638918391005027628.post-85437651089223249982013-03-15T12:27:04.464-07:002013-03-15T12:27:04.464-07:00Hey Andrew,
Thisis a good piece of writing. I lik...Hey Andrew,<br /><br />Thisis a good piece of writing. I liked how even though it was a hort piece, it was very intriguing. However I think you could improve it by making a it a tad longer.Eddy Lhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05454158859488127567noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1638918391005027628.post-31293049943868087592013-03-15T09:28:10.342-07:002013-03-15T09:28:10.342-07:00Hey Andrew,
This is a good post and I like how you...Hey Andrew,<br />This is a good post and I like how you add flavour in you writing! There are a few run-on sentences and remember ms.Lees wanted multi- paragraph! Good job! Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16753993594139767342noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1638918391005027628.post-68659639430531707642013-03-12T21:23:20.817-07:002013-03-12T21:23:20.817-07:00This is a good start! You need to give some exampl...This is a good start! You need to give some examples so that the readers can make a connection. The sentences are run-on. They should be either shortened or chopped. Commas are helpful, too! Instead of "First off I thought", it could be "First off, I thought." This makes it flow easier. This response was very clear!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06593968750205023625noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1638918391005027628.post-61485530509273501982013-03-12T21:03:14.603-07:002013-03-12T21:03:14.603-07:00Hi Andrew, let's try to expand on this-review ...Hi Andrew, let's try to expand on this-review the criteria and expectations on the lass blog. Remember we are working on our multi-paragraph writing skills.Ms Leeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14425588470747075365noreply@blogger.com